Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Had A Bad Day Again

I'm having a bad day. BAD. Well, actually, the past two days have been bad. I am tired and I have no energy. I want to be in bed. I don't want to clean or cook or go to the store or the DMV or any of the places I need to go. I don't have PMS. I am scared.

What if it's coming back? What if this is the beginning of the darkness coming back? What if I'm NOT better and that was just a little fluke of good? It's one of my biggest fears, that I'm truly a broken person. What if that is who I am? I guess everyone deserves a bad day or two though, right? Right? RIGHT? I don't know...

I just feel so fat and ugly and tired and lazy. Layla is barking her fool head off. The floors are dirty and I am not in the mood to mop. I want french fries. There is no way I'm gonna eat them though. My pants are getting too big for me and I'm not going backwards. When I buy new jeans, they will be a size smaller.

I think that we will take a walk soon. Maybe that will help. If I can just get out of my sock monkey slippers....

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